reflections while waiting

Tiny toes and feet. As you kick me, it’s a reminder of the secret weaving together your Creator is engaged in – of you, inside me. What a mysterious miracle! The kicks are as if you are seeking to let me know you’re here. I feel you. I await the moment when I will behold you as your Maker now sees you. The invisible made visible. The imagined becoming reality.

Times two – twice as amazing. It is hard to believe you will have an instant sister from birth and that our family’s size will instantaneously double. It is overwhelming at moments to try to picture what this will mean for us who have for almost four years just been two. What will it be like for us to now be four? How will our lives change? I can’t possibly begin to fathom it. But I cling to the promise of grace that is always equal to the moment and the day. So we will have twice the grace, and we already do.

I am resting now so that you can rest in the place safest for you. I am resting so you can be active. Once you are born, I will be active so that you can rest. You feel at home now, and you cannot imagine a home outside of me. Good! Stay that way for awhile longer yet. But there will come a day when you will be delivered into a larger home that you cannot imagine yet. You will be brought to our home, to a nursery lovingly prepared for you. It will feel strange. It will not feel like home at first. Yet our prayer is that you will find a home in our love, which will ultimately lead you to the One whose love is the best Home in which you can dwell. Enjoy your temporary, mysterious-to-me-yet-within-me dwelling for now. Kick away … and I will await your arrival with an expectant yet patient joy.

Posting today as part of Emily Wierenga’s Imperfect Prose on Thursdays. In Emily’s words, “This is going to be a place where we dig word-deep. where we uncover language lure, and breathe poetry. prose. in the name of faith. . . . Each week, let’s meet and find redemption in the grace of the other. let’s be broken on canvas, on material, on paper, on screen, together . . . for God is there.” Read more Imperfect Prose on Emily’s blog, in the hush of the moon. My friend Julie inspired me to join this.

10 thoughts on “reflections while waiting

  1. I, too, “rested” in bed while I was waiting for my daughter, some 20 years ago. And now your child will have these loving words you have written today, to remember this time when he or she was waiting, growing within you. I especially liked these words:

    “I await the moment when I will behold you as your Maker now sees you. The invisible made visible. The imagined becoming reality.”

    How lovely. May the Lord Himself keep you and your little one safe in His hands.

  2. oh heather, it’s so great to meet you. and this made me weep, for remembering… the beauty of birth. i love the idea of you resting so you might give your little one a safe place. what a loving mother you are… i hear your heart in your written word. i am honored you linked up today, friend. xo

  3. Thanks to all of you, new friends, for your beautiful and encouraging words. I’m enjoying perusing each of your blogs as well. Emily, a special thanks for beginning “imperfect prose on Thursdays,” and allowing me to link up.

  4. oh – so beautiful you write about your twins – enjoyed every word and wish you all the best….a mysterious miracle indeed…
    i have three kids (no twins) but so enjoyed each pregnancy – it’s such a precious and special time

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